My testimony is how trauma had to happen to move me where God wanted me to be. In 2019, I was living in Atlanta, working, and living with my fiancé. Then Covid happened in 2020. I took time off from work because nothing felt certain at the time. My fiancé had gotten sick and passed away very suddenly. He was young, we were in love, and he looked and seemed healthy. He was gone! I didn’t know how to feel or what to do. I wasn’t really getting information from his family about funeral arrangements and then found out he had another life. That wrecked me! I took some time off from work, about a year, and wanted to make a change. I didn’t know if it was moving out of the job or position that I had or moving out of Atlanta altogether. I prayed and said ‘wouldn’t it be nice if this position opened up in this city.’ Well, about a week later, I go onto my companies job posting section and I see that specific position in that specific city become available. I knew this was not coincidence because this type of position, especially in a different city never becomes available. I applied to a few positions, including this one and did a few interviews. When I got offered multiple positions, both to stay in Atlanta (for more money) or move to that city I prayed about, I knew I had a decision to make. I knew right then that my prayer, I unintentionally made was being answered. I do believe in God and I talk to him like a Father and Friend. I understood that a lot of trauma was happening in my life because of the death of my fiancé in that season. Sounds almost sinister, but God is very purposeful and intentional. He knows what is going to happen and allows it to happen for our good and His glory. Death is not good, BUT GOD is! God knew that was already going to happen to my fiancé and positioned me in the right relationship, right place, and right time to let that happen so that it would move me into my next position. God always uses people, places, and things to do His will. I ended up accepting the job, driving all the way from Atlanta across the state to the West Coast, trusting God to set up my life. Before I left Atlanta, I met a coworker who used to live in the city and knew some people there. He connected me with someone so that I could rent a room for a few months until I found an apartment. And that next apartment was actually with that same coworker, who is now my friend! Almost 5 years later, talking about this still feels crazy that I moved, and yet I am so happy! I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, if the relationship I’m in right now is what God wants, but I do know that God is my Shepherd and Driver of my life!
God, my protector! Tubing almost gone wrong
“I went to a lake today with a few friends and was in a tube going down the river. I had no idea what to expect while going down on the tube. I went through one dip, and while going through the second dip, I notice the current was picking up. I see this dip in front of me that scared the hell out of me. I panicked at first but then I heard the Lords voice saying “swim to the left of the river.” I did just that. I found a path that lead back to my friends who were patiently waiting for me to return. I was on the other side of the river, but Thank God was with me. I was rescued by the park rangers and life guards; they even had a lot of first responders waiting to help me get back to safety. The man who helped says to me that I was one lucky person. The drop that I had saw was called Murder Bar and no one has ever made it out alive! They thought they were getting a call to rescue my body out the river. The river gets pumped with water from the dam; the rafting companies pump water into the river to make high currents. I was rescued and saved today! I had a life jacket placed on me and they had a life guard come get me and clip me to him and dragged across the river with a rope. God is good!”
“May the Lord answer you in the day of trouble! May the name of the God of Jacob protect you!” Psalm 20:1 ESV
Jireh, my provider! I need a ram in a thicket
“ I do you believe in God. I went to Catholic school for all of my studies, including the college I attended to get my Bachelors degree. In 2019, I was living in LA and everything was fine. I just finished earning my degree and I was working full time. And then in 2020, Covid happened and everything changed. I was living on my own at the time, far from family and I was laid off from my job because of the pandemic and the uncertainty surrounding this virus. One day, I was sitting on my bed in the afternoon just sobbing because I didn’t know how I was going to pay my rent moving the next month. I decided to pray, knowing that God would take care of all my needs. I had to trust He would hear me. I ended up crying myself into a nap. When I woke up from my nap, I had a text from a family member who I don’t really have a close relationship with. The text was congratulating me on my degree and offering me a gift. The gift was either their old vehicle, which was still in good condition, if I needed one. Or $5000. I started crying as I read the text because I couldn’t believe that my prayer was not only heard, but it was answered and in ways that I didn’t expect. I replied thank you and that I would like to accept the money instead of the car. My family member had one stipulation; that they would send it to me in two parts. I would get the first half ($2500) immediately, and the second half would be the following month. Not only was I able to pay my rent for the next month, but I was able to pay my rent for the following month after that. This gave me time to focus on finding a job that would allow me to save some money. I started working as a food delivery driver with one of the apps. I was able to save what I earned because of the generosity of my family member and the goodness of God!”
In desperation, she prayed what she thought was a simple prayer, ‘God I need you.’ God answer her the way he answered Abraham. Her family member was the ram in the thicket (Genesis 22:13). Before Abraham sacrificed his son, he “lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, behind him was a ram, caught in a thicket by his horns. And Abraham went and took the ram and offered it up as a burnt offering instead of his son.”
God is our Provider in all things and will sustain us. God is referred to by many names in the Bible, and one name is Jireh. In Genesis 22:14, Abraham named the mountain top he was on "The Lord Will Provide" after God provided a ram for sacrifice in place of his son, Isaac. In Hebrew, this is known as Jehovah-Jireh (the Lord will provide).
My love for Jesus! How it all started...
I grew up in a functional family with a hard working father, caring mother, and twin brother. Just the 4 of us navigating life away from a war-torn country I would not get to have a chance to see until many years later (like, decades later). I mention in my Purpose section that I would share my journey (testimony) about how I came to know God, but really Jesus. I always knew God existed and He was somewhere in my life. I didn’t grow up in or going to church; we didn’t pray over meals at the dinner table; read the Bible or do prayers before bed. But for some reason, I knew He existed. What I did not know, was who Jesus was and where He fit into all of this. Fast forward, life is good overall. I guess the stories I had heard from friends and how their childhood was, I felt like my life wasn’t something I should complain about. Everyone has different experiences, traumas, and paths that they walk-in and I was told for a long time ‘it could be worse.’
I don’t remember the exact date, but it was September 2023 and I was in my apartment. I was thinking about what I wanted to do with my life. I loved (still love) being a flight attendant, traveling to many places, and meeting new people. What was the issue? I felt an emptiness that I couldn’t explain. One side of my mind was saying life is great; we have money, take care of our responsibilities, and can see the world. But the other was saying, what is after that? It actually makes me want to cry writing this because the feeling felt so strong, not like a loneliness, but emptiness. Loneliness is the absence of connection, while emptiness is an internal numbness. Internally, I was longing for something, someone. I don’t even remember what I prayed but I know I sat there on my couch talking, asking, and waiting for a response. Fast forward, Tifsit (she has been dubbed my bff) and I are messaging each other and one of her texts says “U have a sister in me who will pray for u from now on” (Dec 16, 2023). I met Tif mid 2022 after starting my career. I knew she had a love for Jesus like no other and was the Blessed Virgin Mary’s fan club VP and she just wears a Joy like a cloak bestowed on her by God! She’s amazing! I asked her if I could go to Paris on her work trip with her for my birthday the following month and she welcomed me! On that trip, she took me to a church with her, and while it was small, beautiful, and quiet, the mass had a different feeling for me. The priest (it was a Catholic church) ministered in French, but the message I kept hearing in my mind was ‘you don’t belong here, you don’t even understand what he is talking about.’ It was this dreadful feeling that I didn't deserve to be in that church, in God’s house. I don’t know why I felt shame but I told Tifsit how I felt and she stopped me and said "That’s the enemy. Don’t believe that. He wants you here.” After I came home from the trip, my life changed. I really didn’t know who I was and felt hungry to find out who Jesus is and why He would want me. So, I bought a Bible and dove into learning His Word. I started asking Tif questions and she discipled me, shared the Gospel, highlighted scripture, the Bible App, and books to read to know more about our Reigning King. Jesus met me in Paris, spoke to my heart in that church, and changed how I wanted to live the rest of my life from that moment on. I knew that I wanted Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I didn’t know what it would look like to seek Him, but I knew life wasn’t going to be the same anymore and I found purpose. In Him, I really did have a new life and it was just beginning (2 Corinthians 5:17).
1 John 4:19 “We love because he first loved us.”
One Testimony at a Time!
“For where two or three are gathered in my name, there I am among them.” Matthew 18:20 ESV
I love learning about people; where they come from, where they have been, where they are going, and who they are (passions, hobbies, goals, etc). My favorite, selfishly, is learning about their faith. What is their spiritual background. It’s not about religion or church, it’s about relationship. I’m open to learning about whatever faith they have (or don’t have) because it connects me more to my own journey. It’s good to question and doubt things, but one thing true for me is that, I’m so grateful to have a relationship with God. We are all learning how to navigate life together, and through these testimonies of how faith has gotten us through valleys and helped us onto mountain tops, we can learn ways to find purpose, peace, and joy!
I hope you enjoy reading the stories as much as I did hearing them. I will not be including names and might alter location and change certain details that still reflect their story, but ensures the people that shared these stories remain anonymous. The stories are meant to give us hope that even in the midst of uncertainty, there’s always Faith to cling to. So, what or Who do you cling to?
Note: I will include scripture versus in the English Standard Version (ESV). There are many versions of the Bible, i.e., KJV, NLT, etc. You could look up the verse in your preferred translation.
Starting Somewhere
(Edited Feb 14, 2024) I deleted the majority of the posts I had under this section because this section was titled ‘Passenger Journals.’ I shared my own experiences through travel until I realized that it’s about our journey through others. I left a couple because I wanted to still maintain the important parts I found about myself that were important.
Here’s one:
Put your mind to anything and you can do what you set out to do. Start somewhere and remember, baby steps. Start by making a list of 10 things you'd like to accomplish in your current year, whether it be traveling to places you've never been, trying a new hobby, or even reading a certain number of books. Be conscious of timing and expectations because you don't want to rush through the process. If you can complete even one thing, make that the one thing you are proud of. This is about balancing yourself while attaining your goals but also doing so by learning and growing as a person. It's important to remember that it is not about striving nor depending on your own strength to make things happen.
Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.”
Remembering China
The best gift you can give yourself while you’re in college is to travel abroad if you get that opportunity. If I could do it all over again, I would! I had the best time of my life in a country where I never thought I’d have a chance to visit, especially without my family with me. I went to Beijing, China in 2011 and still remember everything like it was yesterday! Having an opportunity to engulf yourself in another culture other than the one you are used to will allow you to view the world through others' eyes. My journey to China was an experience I will hold dearly and never forget for the rest of my life. It taught me to learn balance, challenge myself with foods I couldn't eat and made me brave in tough times with a group of people I had the pleasure of calling friends. I still tell stories about my experience till this day! The two professors that went with us became my mentors and my roommate celebrated her birthday in our dorm! I encourage you to go to all the performances, see all the attractions, wander out to find hidden gems and try everything, I mean everything. Well, maybe not the fried silk worms or fried baby sea horses sold at the food markets. Keep your heart open and you'll get to meet amazing people who will show you a day in the life of their shoes and you bring back new perspectives to yourself.
“You will never experience personal growth, if you fear taking chances.” -T Sorensen